Ramblings of a pensive momma...

I have been thinking about this for a while now; try to follow me - I know it is a lot of rambling and probably some pretty bad grammar.

Matt asks me why I allow myself read “sad blogs” for lack of better terms. To honestly answer his question, I do not know why I read them. I feel called to read them.

I begin to envision their lives, I experience their happiness, I laugh with them, I cry with them, and at times I grieve with them. They can break my heart, leave me in tears, and provide me with more grief than I should experience considering it is not even my life, but these stories speak to me.

It is the reality of blogs that draw me to them. It is the raw emotion, the uncensored tales…its life. It is someone’s life; this is really happening.

Am I grateful it is not my life? ..... Yes, but it is a bitter sweet relationship I have with these blogs. I am so blessed; there is no other word to describe my life. I thank God every day, multiple times a day for my children, my husband, my family, and my friends…my blessings.

However, it is their continued faith in God that the authors (complete strangers to me) have that inspire me, plain and simple.

A stranger inspires me.

I have faith, don’t get me wrong. I believe I have a lot of faith. I may not attend church weekly or pray every night before I close my eyes, but I know God is always there. I know he is a part of every aspect of my life, every decision I make, and that he will always be there. A.L.W.A.Y.S.

Matt once asked me how I knew this. I just do, I can feel it. He is part of who I am, who I have always been. I have always known God.

With that said- I wonder what my faith would be like if tested and I mean seriously tested…not in the superficial sense, but the kind tragedy that leaves you grieving for the rest of your life. The kind of ordeal where there is hole in your heart that never closes and an ache that can never be healed.

I find myself sharing photos from these blogs with Caedmon. I tell him the stories of these families and we watch video clips together. I want my son to know what exists in this world by knowing that God created it all - the sick and the healthy, the happy and the sad, the loss and the miracles. You may say that is crazy; he is not even two …but trust me he hears me and he understands what I am saying. It is kind of a special thing we share together. We talk about the babies or the mommies and daddies and we say a little prayer for them together.

I should add that he has become quite the prayer lately too. We thank God for his yogurt, then we thank God for his milk, and we thank God for his red shirt…you get the picture I’m sure.

So if I can teach my children about life, about situations different from what we experience in our life, and about having and maintaining faith in hard times then I believe I am on the right path to being a great parent and a better Christian. Most importantly if I can teach them this; then that means I have a greater understanding of “it all” myself.

While some stories are sad, some joyful, and some are nothing short of miracles – I hug my babies a little tighter each night because of them. These stories are reminders that life is uncertain, we are guaranteed nothing and we should make the most of each minute, hour, and day we have together.

Inspirational Blogs I find myself visiting:

http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/

http://multiplebaby.blogspot.com/

http://gerwerbabies.blogspot.com/

http://thelifeofsuz.blogspot.com/

http://poppyjoy.blogspot.com/

http://thestanfieldjourney.blogspot.com/